In moment’s when we are inconvenienced, we may notice the switch in our mood, the discomfort within our body, and our inability to remain calm. That’s normal right? We lose our favourite scarf, we are met with anger. We break our phone, frustration takes over. All these are emotions we should be aware of, but not allow to consume us. An analogy that resonated with me conflated our emotions with a passing car; this car is flamboyant and wants to be seen, colours vivid, engine proud and loud, it is difficult to ignore. But you just stand, observe, and let it pass, let it drive away. Fair enough? I assume the analogy is simple enough for Harris Westminster students to decipher, but I am aware that in these moments when we are inconvenienced, the stillness and self awareness required may not be as easily accessible to us, our environment playing a factor, alongside prior events leading up to that moment in the day, and this list can carry on. But it all boils down to one skill that we will be exploring in this article: acceptance. A mentality to adopt, which facilities acceptance, is that everything happens for a reason. You lost your scarf? Now you are forced to go to a shop to get a new one, which places you in a position to encounter many things, maybe your new signature coat caught your glimpse as you were taking the escalator down to the ground floor to get your new scarf. Or you bump into a stranger who shares a similar belief with you and because of this momentum is built in the conversation, and now you have a new friend. Phone is broken? You have exams next week anyway, read a book, you did so when you were younger and this is your opportunity to connect with that part yourself that has been drowned by your inevitable adolescence. Or you wanted a new phone and this is your chance to get one. Either way this mentality directs your emotions to a more positive outcome, replacing that avoidable pit of despair with acceptance and trust. Take it as a sign from the universe, a lesson is to be learnt and an opportunity to be gained. Its fine, everything happens for a reason. Yes, this is an incredibly optimistic approach, but it still can be applied. Why punish your mind with negative thoughts when it can be nourished with positive ones? Now, your scarf is lost. You feel the anger coming through, it’s a Red Stallion Monster Jam Truck, ravenous in its approach, speeding towards you. You step back, just stand, observe, and let it pass, let it drive away. Why? Because everything happens for a reason. The universe is not trying to spite you but trying to teach you something or allow for something else to happen. The anger you felt is an appropriate response, all your emotions are an appropriate response, but observe them, notice the heat that may rise in your forehead, the possible clench of your fist or the contortion of your face. Familiarise yourself with this, and with a big inhale followed by an exhale, let it go. Don’t act on it by being snappy at the next person, because that is your emotion to feel, not the friend who’s concerned. If you were to evaluate this approach you may attack its assumption of us having the immediate ability to observe, and not act on, our emotions. But this is a skill, and like many skills, this needs to be developed, put in practise. Failure to do it once deserves no scrutiny, it just means you get to observe this emotion that has started its engine. I have no doubt that the universe will place you in a situation where you are given the chance to put this into practise once again, just be actively aware of your emotions and your next opportunity to hone on this skill will present itself. I myself am no expert, but in situations where I fail to be in control and let go, snapping at another student in response, I apologise and try again. It is in the nature of the universe to give me ups and downs, therefore I will always have a chance to develop this skill. In moments of despair, just remember that it’s fine, it happened for a reason.
Edited by Ayla Samson
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